Yakushima Series

Day 5: Mulligans

Let me start by stating that our last 2 days in the forest, Days 4 and 5, have been nothing short of stellar! Though, there was a day in between the two, beforehand unbenownced to us, that decided to stricken me down with a mindboggling headache and the inability to wake before 10. Speaking of the Goblin King himself, as I just stood up for a quick 'powder', my head about split in half again. But I digress. Suffice it to say, Kana and I didn't make it out into the forest yesterday. Instead, we used plant day (Saturday) to find and tail Umi, which we again did in fine fashion.

I should rewind a bit though, before we get ahead of ourselves. What ever happened to Day 3? Well, as was Day 1, it was a write off. Actually, we did well to get into the forest early, and then proceeded to walk...and walk...and walk some more. We walked for a total of about 6 hours and only had a handful of monkeys to show for it, and none of them Umi group. There's a word for it in Japanese, that goes like this: "Mukatsuku!". It translates basically as 'you are all giant bastards and should go to hell', which about summed up our feelings for the project on Day 3. At roughly 1:30, we packed it in and headed home. I guess the trek took more out of me than I'd figured, since I then slept for 3 hours until dinnertime. I was pooped...but had no poop to report.

Day 4 was full of poop. Five baggies full to be exact. You see, I collect it, not to put on display in my home, but to figure out what kind of and how many nasties live in the innards of our friends the macaques. I can't report on those findings until I get the samples to the lab, but what I can say is 'Peee-ewww'. And boy have I been busy using that little gem of articulation. But it is fun and exciting nonetheless. The nice, and unfortunate, thing about poo is that it has substance. This means I don't have to wade through monkeys to hone in on my prey, I can simply wait for them to vacate. Now pee, on the other hand, does not grant me the same benefit. In general, if I'm not on it like a fly on - you get the gist - it's gone. If only there was a way to get wild monkeys to pee into little cups. After all, evolution has already seen to it once.

Intermission: Kana has a wedding to attend at the end of this month at which she and 7 other girlfriends of the bride will be performing their rendition of the popular Japanese 70's classic "UFO" by Pink Lady. And by the way, they may not be pink, but at 50 they've still got the moves and I wouldn't be one found lobbying for them to stop wearing their skimpy, silver outfits. Me-ow. Anyway, I've become somewhat of a choreography coach, as Kana, alone, has to make up for all the practicing she's missing by not being in Tokyo with all the rest of the gals. But I can make her a star.

Day 5 was full of poop, too. Nice segue? Actually, I got 7 today. But, 3 were from another group, which tried to fool us into thinking they were Umi in the morning. They figured if they hung out on the road by Mirror 56 when we arrived, we'd hang out with them. Wrong. I took some poop and ran. I'm sure they felt used. Especially that one dude with the nose that's ripped in half. He's a little gruff. Though, I'd be, too, if I looked like that. Whoa! In any case, we parted with Puchi and found Umi with relative ease shortly thereafter. Interestingly, we have yet to observe Umi on consecutive days - not counting our initial forays into the forest on the previous weekend before data collection began - and on each second day after, we have found them in almost exactly the same location, across the Kawahara 1 river, roughly half way between road and sea. I wonder what happens on the other days...

"To the point man!" Right, well I'll leave you with the more interesting reports of Days 4 and 5 in the forest. "Take it away, Bob":

1) Remember when I told you about the cross-species barriers being obliterated? Well, on Day 4 I experienced the full effect, as our little friend, who Kana has since quite accurately termed 'Rodeo', found it in her to jump on my backpack and put me in a headlock. She then proceeded to groom my neck, which is hairless, thankfully, and quite unsatisfying to be sure, so she moved on to my hair. There is nothing quite as gratifying as being groomed by a macaque, for whom grooming is the be all and end all of social behaviour. I have become one with the group. But then I remembered that I was a scientist, and chastised our young friend, Rodeo, for her abrasiveness. Fortunately, for the sensitive child in me, Kana was right there with the camera.

2) In following from #1 above, and #1 from Day 2's highlights previously, I took these interactions as solicitations. Though, if you have read highlight #2 from Day 2 you would know, too, that monkeys and deer can be good friends. What we further learned is that human females, contrary to my 'man and monkey' reference, can also succumb to the solicitations of Rodeo, the monkey that could. Kana also found her backpack made quite a useful saddle for the compact sub-adult female to mount. Sadly, I have no camera of my own. Maybe on another occasion, when we are no longer scientists, we can report further.

3) Old female macaques, in this case the one I have named 'Red Obaa-san', enjoy a bout of calisthenics after multiple-mount sessions of sex, or as we say in the relam of sience, copulatory behaviour. Kana witnessed this particular female perform a series of stretches resembling squats following being mounted more than 15 times by a swanky male by the name of 'Scarface'. I realize that this name can lead to either of two conclusions. Sadly for him, the scars have left him looking dopey and unabashedly unattractive. Still, he gave it all to the old gal. And it showed. I also witnessed one of her 'squats' well after the two had stopped, and it seemed to me that she was still feelin' it. Chalk one up for ugly.

4) On a final note for the day, I want to end with a public service announcement. We all remember that commercial sponsored by the War Amps with the robot jumping through some kind of masachistic maze, built with saws and gears and all kinds of industrial machinery designed to mame and mangle, who smugly says at the end of it "I can put my arm back on, you can't, so play safe". Well, I'd like to run a playback experiment for the macaques here. In the week that we've spent with the monkeys, here's what we've seen:
-nose cut in half
-puncture wound under the chin (Umi-O)
-puncture wound on the heel
-numerous facial cuts and wounds
-broken wrist
-broken ankle
-2-inch gash on inside of leg

And last but not least for our friendly robot ambassador:
-arm severed just below the elbow (Lefty)

Clearly the last gal should have payed attention, and so should they all. I know I exercise just that much more caution now when I tarzan across the canopy for having seen those adverts. Thank you War Amps. Thank you smug robot.